Traveling Companions..

Last week I started out by "being honest". Well I'm going to top that and be a little a lot more honest. I'm struggling. Moving to a new city has been hundreds of times more difficult than I anticipated it to be. I have never longed to see a "familiar" face so strongly in my life. However, as has been reminded to me many times over here recently, nothing worth having comes easy. So whatever is coming next must really be something :)

I have been taught (and have always believed) that there is a constant battle going on for our souls. I've just never felt or seen it before as I do now. Welcome to the real world, right? Both the Lord and Satan have made their attempts very tangible to me lately. It's amazing how "believing" something versus seeing this actualize in your own life precipitates such stronger emotions.

Since moving to Orlando, I have stepped back into the role of "Church Shopping". Something I have done before, but doing so outside the so-called "Bible-Belt" is such a different experience. Tonight I went to a church that I have really enjoyed recently (really, the only one I've enjoyed so far...) and I'm nearly certain the minister was looking at my very life when he assembled his sermon. No, I'm not so self-absorbed to actually think that, but God really had some points to make to me. He sure got my attention and I was all ears. He was discussing community and the art of living in both grace AND truth.

I've always been surrounded by amazing community, and have therefore taken for granted what a blessing it is. I still have community, just not as physically close by as I've enjoyed having in the past. And I'm working on developing that community here, but like I said, it's been much more of a challenge than I gave it credit for.

There are people that we know that live very much in "truth". You know them - the people who would never dream of sugar coating the truth. They are going to shoot you straight between the eyes and not think twice about it. And then those people that live very much in "grace". The people that will do everything in their power to avoid conflict at any cost. The "bless their heart" saying folks.

John 1:14 tells us...
The Word became flesh and made his dwelling among us. We have seen his glory, the glory of the one and only Son, who came from the Father, full of grace and truth.

He mastered the art of Grace AND Truth.

If you were to draw a scale, at one end being all grace and the other end being all truth, where would you plot? It's a tricky act to balance. And to be the best community partner possible, we must be equipped to love in both capacities. To show grace and face the hard stuff square on - and even harder still, to have the wisdom to know when each of these acts are appropriate!

In my community, both that I have and hope to acquire, I want my "partners in crime" to be evenly balanced - so they will be able to shoot me straight when I need it, and cover me with grace when I need it. I am in need of this community now. I pray for it constantly, and I know that this is part of the "something awesome" that is just around the corner.

God, thank you for your grace and your truth. I recognize that the hardship and tears of the present are simply a means to an amazing end, and that you will never put me into a position you will not see me through. I pray you give me the strength to lean on you through these wars, and know that you are bigger and stronger and wiser than even the largest of my battles. God, thank you for knowing my most intimate thoughts and needs and downfalls, and loving me still. Keep reminding me that in order to gain community, I must be community. Thank you for the excellent example of life in grace and truth, and help me to improve on where I "plot" all the time. Lord, I want to know you more and to shine a brighter light. I choose to stop fighting and to surrender to your plan. Help me to see and hear you for the next right step."